Young Kenny Campbell, the adventurous young lad who took a tumble over the right field wall in Citizens Bank Park on Thursday, was a guest on TODAY to get questioned by the thinning head of Matt Lauer. Kenneth tries to piece together the horrific events like only a 10-year old can,

“It’s kind of scary,” Campbell told TODAY co-hosts Matt Lauer and Meredith Vieira on Friday. “But I remember catching the ball and falling over the fence and thinking, I don’t want to land on my head, so I tried to do some sort of flip.”

His “flip” was successful, although it looked more like a “flail” to me. His mother (whom I’d like to eff) and father were by his side during the interview, but we learned they were not at the game that night. When his father heard what happened he tried calling Kenny’s cell phone (he has a cell phone?!) and when he eventually got a hold of him asked the same question every concerned parent would in that situation,

“I tried to figure out if he is OK,” explained Ken Campbell. “So I said, ‘Did you hold the ball?’ and he said yes.

“And I said, ‘Well, who’d you meet?’ and he said, ‘I met Mike Pelfrey.’ So I knew he was OK.”

Wonderful. How could he possibly be hurt if he met Mike Pelfrey?

But alas, the kid is fine, and for his troubles he received an autographed bat & ball from Ryan Howard as well as tickets to a future Phillies game. Almost makes you wish you were the one who fell 15-feet onto the warning track.

The most disturbing part was this kid was parading around in his Phillies cap, but he’s actually from New York and roots for the Yankees…

FRONT-RUNNER!

Here’s the TODAY interview in it’s entirety:

The best part is when Meredith Viera says, “I noticed you weren’t even looking at that tape when we played it back, it’s got to be hard to look at that.”

WHILE THEY KEEP RE-PLAYING IT ON A CONTINUOUS LOOP.

Baseball fan takes plunge, but comes up with ball | TODAY

If you laugh at this, you can punch your ticket to hell immediately:

Poor kid. Luckily, Mike Pelfrey was ovulating so his maternal instincts kicked in and he comforted the young boy before he was driven off the field and straight to Children’s Hospital. He was later released sustaining only minor injuries.

Wise up, young’n, it’s not worth breaking your neck for a $14.99 baseball.

(Clip furnished by The World of Isaac)

Without question, the best part about coming from behind to beat the Metros is watching their loser fans react to the inevitable, and last night was no exception.

In the fifth inning, when the Fightins’ were in the midst of coming back from their early 7-0 deficit, Ryan Howard jumped on an outside fastball delivered by the no-longer-intimidating Pedro Martinez. The astute CW57 cameraman must have been scoping out the angriest of the Metro fan prior to the blast, and immediately cut to a volatile gentleman who most likely dropped some major cash for a first row seat. Around the :22 second mark, you can clearly see Mr. Temper mouth some expletives before becoming so enraged, he just gets up out of his seat and walks out.

hahahaah:

“Hey. It’s brad. Now that the mets are spanking them no need to guest post.”

At 9:42 PM (when the Phillies cut the lead to 7-6):

“Okay. I take it back.

“Too late,” I replied. Didn’t these Mets fans learn anything from last year?

Brad Lidge was a guest on Comcast SportsNet’s Daily News Live yesterday and was asked the same question that Jimmy Rollins incorrectly answered last week, “What is your opinion of the Philly fans?”

Now, granted, Lidge hasn’t had to face the wrath of the angry Philadelphian yet, but considering his last few years in Houston weren’t exactly a walk in the (Minute Maid) park (I crack myself up!) - he at least has a point of reference. Well anyway, Lidge passed his test with flying colors; practically performing audio-fellatio on the Philly fans, just the way we like it:

And no, “sign your wife’s shirt” is not a euphemism for “bang her repeatedly” — although it very well could be. Take a look at one gentleman’s YouTube submission entitled, “Pat Burrell autgraphs [sic] my wife’s shirt”:

haha, Pat says, “Just hold it tight and don’t move.”

Something tells me that’s not the first time he’s used that line on a young lady in San Diego, AMIRITE? The woman counters with, “You’re my favorite and I like your butt.”

You stay classy, San Diego. (Get it? Like that character said in Anchorman?)

During last night’s Phillies/Padres game, Brian Giles attempted to catch a foul ball and practically re-created the famous Rodney McCray wall crash in front of a nationwide audience on ESPN. As Jayson Werth’s fly ball was carrying towards the right field wall, Giles gave chase and made a noble effort for the catch, but wound up barreling through the Welk Resorts advert in foul territory. Thankfully, Giles stayed in the game and proceeded to go 0-4.

Go ahead, laugh:

Phillies pitcher and receiver of no run support, Cole Hamels, shot a commercial recently with the Jeff D’Ambrosio Auto Group in Downingtown. The self-proclaimed #1 Dodge/Chrysler/Jeep/Mitsubishi/Suzuki dealer on the East Coast stuck him with two radio nobodies, gave him two lines to say, and figured this would have the Dodge Rams flying off the friggin lot. It’s rather stupid and unnecessary, so for Cole’s sake, I hope he got a free car with a powertrain warranty out of the deal.

Enjoy?:

Randy Marsh, the 1B umpire for Sunday’s Phillies/Pirates rain-delayed matinée, learned one of life’s valuable lessons the hard way — DO NOT IMPEDE THE PROGRESS OF JAMIE MOYER.

In the bottom of the 3rd inning with nobody out and Carlos Ruiz on first (!!!!) trailing 1-0, Jamie Moyer stepped in the box to lay down a bunt and advance the runner. He got down a good one — about 10 feet down the first base line — causing the Pirates battery of Jason Davis and Ryan Doumit to collide, and Davis’ throw sailed wide of the bag at first. So Moyer, highly energetic for a 45-year old, took off for second. The only problem was Randy Marsh was in the way. But instead of running around the umpire, or possibly stopping to avoid him, Jamie gave Marsh a little two-handed, “Get the eff outta my way!”-shove barreling the old man to the dirt.

Moyer ended up on third base after the bizarre sequence and scored on a Jimmy Rollins sac fly to shallow center two pitches later. After crossing home plate, Moyer did a bee-line for the dugout to receive some oxygen and congratulations from his teammates.

Here’s the footage:

For the third straight start, Brett Myers looked every bit like the Opening Day starter he was tabbed to be in the beginning of the season.  More importantly, he picked up the much-needed win and kept the Phillies a game ahead of the Metros for first place in the NL East.  So what made Brett flip out at Phils skip, Charlie Manuel last night?  Let’s review…

Having allowed only five hits and one run through 7+, Brett retired Freddy Sanchez for the second out of the eighth.  Clinging to a 3-1 lead with Chris Gomez on 2nd and lefty Doug Mientkiewicz due up, Charlie Manuel didn’t take any chances and emerged from the dugout to lift Myers in favor of lefty-killer, JC Romero.

This obviously perturbed Brett, who you could see mouthing “This is my fucking game” before handing Charlie the ball without even acknowledging him, tipping his cap to the crowd, and throwing a semi-tantrum in the dugout.  Take a gander:

By the sound of the post-game quotes, it appears as though the two kissed and made up.  Here’s Myers’ take,

“I’m a competitor, I like competing and I wanted to stay in and finish the game. But sometimes your emotions get the best of you and you might do something irrational out there. He thought I did. That’s part of the game. It’s all patched up now, though. We’re buddies.

I missed a month without being here with the team, and I wanted to try to prove myself again that I can pitch in the big leagues - and I wanted to stay out there as long as I could. He made the decision and that’s his decision.”

Now Charlie,

“He’s fine, he just wanted to stay in the game and I like that. There’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, if he didn’t want to stay in the game, I’d probably be mad.

I’ll tell you something: his confidence got back. That’s why I took him out of the game. I wasn’t going to let him lose the game. He was leaving on a high note, and there’s four left-handed hitters standing there. I wasn’t going to give him a chance to get hit. He already pitched a good game and did a good job.”

These two are so cute when they fight.

Myers, Manuel battle in Phils win | Inquirer

What? Nobody requested more Kurt Angle? Are you sure?

Well too bad, fuck-o — I had to pause Madden ‘08 ‘09 just to throw this shit up. It’s a Sunday anyways, don’t be so greedy. Enjoy watching Kurt Angle swing a baseball bat like an uncoordinated 5-year old girl.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a 2nd down and long to convert…

• How do you spell retard? on What does the Bond girl have in common with Antonio Alfonseca?
• FreddiePickles on What does the Bond girl have in common with Antonio Alfonseca?
• Whittle on What does the Bond girl have in common with Antonio Alfonseca?
• AJ on Ghea City Wagers
• Sean on Meet Rich Campbell