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Posts Tagged ‘THE FIGHTINS DOT COM EXXXCLUSIVE!’

May
10
2010
Posted by meech.one at 11:33 am ET 37 Comments

Yo — according to my inside source, the Phillies @ Blue Jays series that was supposed to take place June 25-27 in Toronto has been relocated to good ol’ Citizens Bank Park because of some kind of political summit thing. Booyakasha!

More details as they emerge…

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May
05
2010
Posted by Mike Meech at 2:17 pm ET 55 Comments

Hey, guess what? The Phillies bullpen sucks, that’s what.

But I’m sure you didn’t need me to tell you that. Through twenty-six games so far this year, the pen (collectively) has a gaudy 4.46 ERA with 4 blown saves. As a matter of fact, the only two guys who have been worth a damn are Chad Durbin (12.1 IP, 2.19 ERA, 0 HR allowed, 9K, 5 BB) and Jose Contreras (7.2 IP, 1.17 ERA, 1 HR allowed, 14 K, 0 BB), but the rest of them? Garbage.

The worst of the bunch — BY FAR — has been Danys Baez. Let’s put it this way — In 10 IP in 2010, Danys has given up 9 earned runs; in 49 IP, Roy Halladay has given up 8. Now, I guess you could use that stat to point out how good Roy has been, but for the purposes of this post I want it to exemplify how sucky Baez has been.

Okay, now here’s the important question: Why have they been this bad? Is it some bad luck BABIP maneuver that will eventually even itself out? Is it a case of the dreaded “noodle arm?” Is it because they do dumb shit like kick a metal chair when they get aggravated?

Perhaps some of that plays into their suckage, but reader Chris Hoffman may have found a simpler reason:

I was out in Arizona last weekend for a couple of games and sat by the bullpen for one of them. I think I figured out the cause of the struggles they’ve been having. Check out the pictures, I think the team needs a new nutritionist.

You heard the man, check out the pictures.

A closer look:

DEAR LORD, THAT’S AN ENTIRE COOLER BAG FILLED WITH CANDY!

If they’re not giving up runs, they’re gorging themselves with Nestle Crunch bars!

Now that I think about it, that’s probably the reason DJ Fatty Fat waddled out near the bullpen last night. He probably sniffed out their stash from Section 135. Now whip yourselves into shape, bullpen! Because at this rate, you’ll all be a bunch of Dennys Reyes’ by year’s end.

Apr
21
2010
Posted by meech.one at 1:42 pm ET 79 Comments

During his day off on Monday, just prior to taking off for a flight to Atlanta, Phillies slugger Ryan Howard made a pit stop at the Nottingham Elementary School in Oxford, PA to be the “mystery reader” in his girlfriend Krystle Campbell’s classroom.

You remember Krystle, right? She’s the Eagles cheerleader/elementary school teacher who accompanied Ryan to a Super Bowl party in Miami this past January. Well, apparently, these two kids are still an item, otherwise I highly doubt Ryan would make time in his busy schedule to go visit an ex-girlfriend of his in Oxford, PA.

Anyway, according to our super-sexy spy in Chester County, Meghan O’Connor (the story has since been CONFIRMED by the school secretary), Ryan arrived at Nottingham Elementary mid-morning and read a book to his girlfriend’s 2nd grade students. Afterward, Ryan even hung around for a while and played kickball with the kids at recess. How cool is that?

I mean, the closest I ever got to a celebrity visiting my grade school was Brushy The Clown.

After the jump, check out Ryan’s girl working it out for the Eagles cheerleader judges earlier today…

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