Pictured above in the brown fedora, Oakley shades, argyle sweater, and red checkered button-up, is none other than the most fashionable man in broadcasting, Sarge Matthews.

That gorgeous photo was captured near Broad & Oregon by the lens of the distinguished R. Bradley Maule of Philly Skyline at the Philadelphia Phillies parade of champions Friday afternoon. If you’ve never been, I highly recommend stopping by B-Love’s site and checking out the gorgeous photography; ESPECIALLY his pics from the Phillies games this year.

Go now.

Philadelphia, 31 October 2008, WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP PARADE | Philly Skyline
2 November 08. WFC: World Series Champions | Philly Skyline

Who’s ready for completely random shit that’s thrown together for no apparent reason?

Good. Here we go…

• Chase Utley used to be a violin-playing, parrot-toting kiddie-dork. Obviously, things done changed.

• Here’s the video of a potty-mouthed Greg Dobbs countering a teammates “Yeah!” with a more energized, “Fuck Yeah!!” I’m pretty sure Shane Vic gets in on the nationally televised cussing as well:

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In a brilliant move, the Phillies have recruited two Phillies greats to throw out the ceremonial first pitch — the MVP of the ‘83 NLCS and the most stylish man in broadcasting, Sarge Matthews, along with overseer of the Phillies annual BBQ challenge and coverer of one-quarter of the earth’s surface, Garry Maddox.

I couldn’t think of a more perfect way to kick-off the series.

NLCS Game 1 Details | Phillies.com

Sarge Matthews has been spotted in and around the stadium wearing some fantastic hats since he’s been employed by the Phillies. But none have had as much style or flair as the coolie-style straw hat he was sporting yesterday while hanging out in the Spanish broadcast booth.

Behold, my new favorite Sarge Matthews hat:

(Photo taken by frequent Fightins commenter, Lynniemac. Gracias.)

During the bottom of the fifth inning of tonight’s Phillies/Braves game, Tom McCarthy continued to cater to fans of the Sarge Matthews hat collection (meeee!) and brought up the stylings of one Brian Dawkins during the post game press conference last night. Sarge, of course, had his own opinion:

That hat was very, very serious.  It cost him a few bucks, I’ll tell you that.

Well, if anyone would know Sarge, it’s you.

While the Phillies broadcast was starting of the bottom of the fourth inning last night, Tom McCarthy wasted no time getting into one of my favorite subjects — Sarge Matthews’ hats. Tom has apparently been receiving letters from a “woman” named “Helen Litz” (You don’t think I use my real name when I send those in, do you?) and she wanted to know exactly how many hats were in the Sarge Matthews collection.

The always modest Sarge tried to get away with the answer, “several” but T-Mac wasn’t having any of that — he demanded an actual count. Sarge told him it was “somewhere in the neighborhood of 30-40″ and as the conversation went further, he admitted that he has about 25 winter hats, which he didn’t count in the original total. Add it all up and that’s a shitload of awesome hats. I’m imagining you have to access his hat room like Bruce Wayne does the Batcave; by tugging on the head of a statue or pulling a certain book off the bookcase revealing a temperature-controlled section of the mansion specifically designed to house his gorgeous fedora collection. Ahhh, who am I kidding. It’s probably way cooler than that!

Here’s the video:

Here it is, Sarge fans.

Finally, the most stylish broadcaster in the business — in a duet with his grandson Denver — performed “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” within the friendly confines of Wrigley Field. Of course, he didn’t let down the Phillies fans. Instead of singing the expected “root, root, root for the Cubbies”, he let the crowd say it. He didn’t go with the requisite, “Now, go score some runs!” either, he just told the Cubs fans he loved them. so, even though he spent the last three years of his illustrious career and was on the coaching staff with Chicago, he definitely stayed loyal to his current home, Philadelphia.

Phillies radio broadcaster Larry Anderson couldn’t help but get his digs in at the Sarge,

“Larry Andersen said they’re dipping low in the barrel if they’re asking me to do it. I’ll be OK. I know the words and I’ll be fine.”

Well I’d say he was more than OK.  In his best baritone voice, here’s a fedora’d Sarge bringing down the house during the 7th inning stretch. Ah one, ah two, ah three:

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Are you holding onto your Borsalino’s, Sarge fans?

Good. Because this Thursday night, when the Cubs and Phillies kick off their all-important 4-game series at Wrigley, everyone’s favorite colorman will be singing “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” during the 7th inning stretch. Incredible, right?

Sure, the whole idea of performing this song at The Friendly Confines is to root for the Cubbies, but being that he resides in Chicago and used to play for the North Siders means he gets a temporary one-day pass. Just make sure you’re in front of your TV after the Phillies bat in the 7th inning — I guarantee it’ll be fantastic. And if you somehow miss it, rest assured: I’ll have the video up by Friday morning.

Below, you will find a clip of Sarge and Scott Franzke from WPHT 1210 last night where Sarge announces his new gig and exclaims, “The worst you are, the better they like it.” Below that is a tremendous photo from the 7th Annual Gary Maddux BBQ Challenge, apropos of nothing.

Audio: Sarge talks about singing at Wrigley

(A tip of the fedora to jstudent over at Philly Edge for the heads-up)

I don’t know much about former Padres pitcher and current analyst Mark “Mud” Grant, but I do know one thing: In the short amount of time the Phillies were in San Diego, he obviously tried copying off the King of Broadcasting Style, Sarge Matthews. Friday night, the man whom they call Mud was in the Padres broadcasting booth - sans hat - to witness the 1-0 pitcher’s duel between Jamie Moyer and Greg Maddux. Well, guess who showed up Saturday night wearing a cheap imitation of a Sarge hat?

(Alright, I’ll tell you — Mark Grant)

Now, I’d be willing to bet Mr. Grant was roaming around the press area on Friday night, caught a glimpse of one of the many beautiful hats in the Sarge Matthews hat collection and rushed to the nearest San Diego hat store. Then he grabbed some crappy hat hoping he would look as cool as The Sarge.

Hate to break it to you Mark, but NO ONE is as cool as Sarge Matthews. NO ONE!

Last night was the annual “Christmas in July” celebration at The Bank, and I gotta say, that was the shittiest fucking Christmas EVAR. A sold-out stadium had to sit there and witness yet another anemic offensive performance as the Braves beat the Phillies for the first time in their last eight tries.

The only highlight was this guy (who Sarge called a “she”) wearing some ridiculous homemade Mickey Mouse Christmas hat.

No shit, it was the best part of the game.

Even the Comcast graphics guys (who are usually on top of their game) shit the bed.

That’s Greg Dobbs, dummies:

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