Posts Tagged ‘LOLMets’
I have no idea what’s going on here, but this dude talking reminds me of Borat and the Phanatic steps on a Mets hat. Good enough for me!
1:10 PM on PHL 17
Vance Worley (2-0, 2.14 ERA)
PHILLIES: The Phils look to complete a sweep of the Mets on the one-year anniversary of Roy Halladay’s Perfect Game. If you want a laugh, take a look at the starting lineup for the good guys today. According to my man David Hale from the Wilmington News Journal, five of the nine Phils starters today were not on a big-league Opening Day roster in 2010. One way or another, today’s game should be good for a laugh.
Jonathan Niese (3-5, 4.33 ERA)
LOLMETS: The Mets really suck. They’re awful and they’re stupid. Nobody likes them. My great-grandmother’s dying words were “Jesus Christ, I fucking hate the Mets.” The crazy part about that was that she was Pennsylvania Dutch and hardly spoke any English. I didn’t even know she liked baseball. The Mets suckery transcends boundaries that way.
Picture courtesy of Amazin Avenue
7:10PM on FOX
Cole Hamels (6-2) 3.06 ERA
PHILLIES: He is so overdue for a win at Shiti Field it is bordering on ridiculous. Last time he pitched he got 10 runs of support, hoping he gets the same this time.
Mike Pelfrey (3-4) 5.37 ERA
LOLMETS: I’m just happy we don’t have to watch him fumble around with that mouth guard anymore that stopped him from biting his tongue off during his delivery. That was pretty disgusting.
Also, when I woke up this morning look what was still trending on twitter:
7:10PM on CSN
Roy Oswalt (3-2) 2.77 ERA
PHILLIES: The last time he faced the Mets at Shiti Field he threw a complete game shut out. Another would be pretty awesome.
Chris Crapuano (3-5) 5.36 ERA
LOLMETS: Fuck the Mets.
Why in the hell did I not think of this? This is probably the best license plate I have ever seen. If this person doesn’t read this blog I would be shocked. So whoever you are, if you read this, please email us so we can give you the credit you deserve (and also so I can hunt this license plate down and steal it).
UPDATE: This fine photo was sent in by a reader Matt and it is his friend Dean’s plate. Good work Dean.
The last time we checked in with the Mets LOLMeter most of you might have missed it since it was on a Saturday night and you probably have a life. Actually you probably don’t (God knows I don’t) so just pretend you didn’t see it, I’ll pretend I didn’t write it, we’ll all look cooler. Anyway, last time we let out a hearty LOLMets at RA Dickey basically saying his team is as bad as they look and everyone needs to get the rainbows out of their asses and start being real. That registered in at a 9 on the LOLMeter, this time we find the meter set at 10. Now we have to laugh at something that has been known for a while, but has now finally come to it’s fruition.
The New York Mets are paying Bobby Bonilla $1.5 million for the next 25 years.
Take a jump to see how many players on the Phillies 2011 roster he is making more money than.
8:00PM on ESPN
Criff Ree (2-2) 4.18 ERA
PHILLIES: Clifton only gave up 5 hits against the D’Bags last time he pitched but with those 5 hits they managed 4 runs. All while the Phillies offense was sitting around thumbs firmly planted in buttholes as Ian Kennedy shut them out. I don’t think the Mets will even get the same amount of hits and they definitely won’t score 4 runs.
Chris Young (1-0) 2.65 ERA
LOLMETS: He was recently on the DL, status quo for him, and then was sick with the flu. Hmm, wasn’t Mike Pelfrey just sick with the flu? I am lead to believe one of two things is happening here. Either the thought of having to go against our starting pitchers makes opposing pitchers sick, or Chris Young and Mike Pelfrey have been making out. It is probably both.
1:10PM on FOX
Roy Halladay (3-1) 2.41 ERA
PHILLIES: Roy fell just one out short of his second complete game of the season last time out while throwing a bajillion pitches and throwing Phillies fans into a panic about his pitch count this early in the season and then everyone saying BUT THERE IS AN EXTRA DAY OFF BECAUSE THEY ARE OFF ON THURSDAY OMGZORF HE’LL BE FINEZ!!!! Or something like that. I dunno. Phillies obviously win this game, it’s as simple as GM-Carson put it.
Jonathan Nose (1-3) 5.10 ERA
LOLMETS: Wait, didn’t we already beat this douche this year? Pretty sure we did. Oh yea, he pitched 4 innings with 6 earned runs against us. HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF EXCEPT WORSE BECAUSE THE PHILLIES SCORE 7 OFF HIM. Sorry for getting loud.
7:05PM on PHL17
Vance Worley (0-0) -.– ERA
PHILLIES: Well Big Joe has hit the DL and Vance Worley has been called up. His glasses are pretty sweet. Also, we’re facing the Mets so I really don’t think it’s even possible to lose this game.
Mike Pelfrey (1-2) L.OL ERA
LOLMETS: Remember when people thought Mike Pelfrey was good? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA me neither.
- AnimaniacZero on Video of Cliff Lee’s first career home run
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- Chutley on Video of Cliff Lee’s first career home run