Congratulations, Jimmy and Shane. Winners of shiny, new 2008 Rawlings Gold Glove trophies.

Keep those awards coming, MLB.

Rollins, Victorino snare Gold Gloves | Phillies.com

Previously:
Brad Lidge: 2008 NL Comeback Player Of The Year | The Fightins

Jimmy Rollins ran on to the field sporting the full-on Elmer Fudd look at the start of Game 5 in Philly. The same one that originally debuted last night during the post game interview with the clueless Chris Meyers. 

“Coach Joe” Maddon actually wore them every game in Philly with the flaps up, but after seeing Young James last night, him and Carl Crawford surely copied the reigning MVP.

Last night:

Tonight:

(Oh yeah, and Shane hit a 2-run single that put the Phillies up 2-0)

While accentuating another umpire blunder in this series (that’s #5 if you’re keeping track at home), the FOX graphics team put a purdy little frame around a close-up of Evan Longoria’s glove knuckle-deep in Jimmy Rollins’ ass.  What a gorgeous painting that would make!

You could honestly just crop out the rest of the shot, print that sucker out, and nail it to your living room wall.

Thanks for that, FOX.

I just want to congratulate Gregg Doyel (spellchecked: “Greg Doyle”) for picking up on this story eight days after it happened. That’s quality journalism. Wait until he finds out that Gene Upshaw died!

In one of his latest shovelfuls of hypertexcrement, “Philly’s boo babies bark, can’t take Rollins’ bite,” Gregg agrees with Jimmy Rollins’ public assessment of Phillies fans as front-runners. Also, it would appear that Doyel has never heard boos before. These noises must frighten and confuse him, compelling him to write a column about it. Now, here’s what this genius postulates about us “babies”:

“Look, Philly fans, you can’t have it both ways. If you’re going to dish it, you have to be able to take it. Flick a player in the nose all you want, but when one of them flicks you back, you have to smirk and let him know it didn’t hurt. Otherwise, you’re nothing but a schoolyard bully — strong because you have all that size, but weak as soon as someone fights back.”

Oh, my, where to begin dissecting this brilliant editorial deduction? OK, here’s what Doyel believes:
Read more »

Rollins’ First Law of Emotion: “…for every action, there’s a reaction.”

A noble experiment though it was, “Campaign Cheer” failed in its quest to persuade the faithful at Citizens Bank Park to refrain from making all but the most supportive noises. The urge to boo Jimmy Rollins was too great to resist, and watching the shortstop go hitless again did little to soothe the savage beasts.

“If they want to boo me, that’s fine. Boo me. Just keep it off everyone else. . . . You had some cheers, you had some boos. Like I said, when you get the win, they’ll cheer you.”

Cheering after a victory? Typical Philadelphia fan mentality. I’ll bet they’re unhappy when the team loses, too, the ungrateful bastards.

If nothing else, the outpouring of Rollins’ soul brought forth what may be my favorite J-Roll quote, ever:

That should be on a T-shirt, you say? Consider it done!

In between their ass-whoopings at the hands of the Los Angeles Dodgers while barely clinging on to first place, Jimmy Rollins and Ryan Howard paid a visit to those hoodlums on The Best Damn Sports Show.  Instead of talking about who the zaniest guy in the locker room is, or whatever the hell they talk about on that show, Young James thought it was the appropriate time to express his opinion on Philly (more specifically, Phillies) fans.  The outcome makes me wanna punch a certain MVP-winning shortstop in the throat:

“There are times, ya know it’s like, one of those cities they, ya know… I might catch some flak for this — they’re front-runners. When you’re doing good, they’re on your side, When you’re doing bad, they’re completely against you”

Frontrunners, Jimmy? You mean, for the past 25 years we’ve only supported all those winning teams we had? All fucking zero of them? That’s the only time we support our teams?

Oh, okay. So when like, our defending MVP shortstop is having a shitty season and is on pace to score about 70 less runs than he did last year — we should just unconditionally support him? Is that what you mean? Or when that same defending MVP gets benched for not running out fly balls or gets stuck in traffic on his way to a game vs. the Mets — we should just brush it off and cheer you on anyway? Got it. Thanks for the tip, J-Roll.

I gotta be honest though, the following quote is the one that really shouldn’t have been made:

“For example, Ryan [Howard]’s from St. Louis. Ya know, St. Louis, it seems like, they support their team. They’re out there… and they’re encouraging. In Philly, you can’t be no punk.”

No disrespect to Cardinals fans, but these are the same guys that gave a standing ovation — twice — to So Taguchi upon his return this year. I’m sorry, Jimmy, but we don’t get down like that.

We, as Philadelphians, are mostly annoyed when the players we cheer for don’t give a concerted effort.  When they look like they’re not trying, or making stupid mental errors, we let them know.  But for the most part, our anger is focused towards the inept management of the franchises here.  Players who do their job and try usually get a pass.

And if that annoys you, Jimmy, go to fucking St. Louis and play.

Last week, as you may recall, I posted the ostentatious Jimmy Rollins CRIBS segment from MTV — but before you could say “cease and desist,” VAMOOSE!  It disappeared.   Well this week I’m back to test the mettle of Viacom’s lawyers with an extra-special “bonus” segment that was cut because Dale Earnhardt’s crib spanned two commercial breaks.  This one features his memorabilia room (a tad better than my memorabilia room), his gym (featuring the lovely Johari) and his Asian/Chinese/Japanese room where he gets his “fung schwung” on.  Enjoy it while it lasts:

Check out this clip from a Chase Utley “5 Questions” segment that originally aired on Comcast in late May. DNL Live host Michael Barkann asks Chase, “Which teammate is always late?”

After taking a second or two to think about it, Chase blurts out “Jimmy Rollins.”

I apologize in advance for the shitty quality of the video, but all you really need is the audio.

Odds are, if you watched more than 1 inning of baseball during the first half of the season, you saw the nauseating Baby Ruth ad campaign promoting their dumb “Take Me Out To The Ballgame 100th Anniversary” contest. In case you haven’t — real quick — fans were encouraged to submit their own version of “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” and the winner would sing it during the 7th inning stretch at the All-Star Game. And I think they got a lifetime supply of Baby Ruth or something.

Anyway, they made an entire TV show out of the process with the equally-irksome ESPN. It featured the fan submissions plus renditions by actual major leaguers. The last two NL MVP’s, Ryan Howard & Jimmy Rollins, had the displeasure of judging the player versions. But at they very end, obviously disappointed with everyone else’s output, RyHo and Young James put their own twist on the classic song…

You know they had to do a remix, right?

Enjoy the vocal stylings of Ryan Howard with Jimmy Rollins playing the part of the lunchroom table drum machine.

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