As most of you have heard by now, Eric Bruntlett was officially granted free agency by the Phillies thus ending his career in Philadelphia. Most will remember him for his unassisted triple play against the Mets, him scoring the winning runs in both games three and five of the 2008 World Series, but I will remember him for his beard. Bruntlett’s beard became somewhat of a phenomenon in Philly and, I think, it was mostly stopped him from getting booed non stop.

This brings me to a much more pressing matter. With Bruntlett gone, Park maybe going elsewhere to start instead of staying a reliever, and Pedro Feliz becoming a free agent this team’s facial hair quota is in serious question. I find extreme facial hair to be vital to any winning ball club. The Yankees are the only exception to this rule but hey, they use steroids.

So thanks Beardo for scoring those winning runs, stepping up when Jimmy got hurt in 2008, not being able to hit your own weight, making the Mets 2009 season a little funnier than it already was, and having an epic beard. So long Beardo, you will be missed by some, not so much by others.

Oh, and Happy Thanksgiving bitches.

Since returning from the DL a week and a half ago, Phillies closer Brad Lidge hasn’t had many opportunities to close out games. His first appearance last Friday against the Blue Jays went horribly wrong (in a non-save situation), then on Sunday he came in to close it and got some help escaping that inning courtesy of the horrendous baserunning of Toronto’s John McDonald.

Finally, after a six-day hiatus from game action, Brad Lidge emerged the bullpen against the Metros yesterday with a sharp 96-mph fastball while sporting the beginning stage of a bad-ass beard for his first 1-2-3 inning in what seems like years. Needless to say, Grizzly Lidge was pumped.

Photo: Ron Cortes/The Inquirer

Hey – you guys wanna see the coolest fucking print of the year?

Genius, right?  I think if you’re only gonna buy one piece of artwork this year, this best be it.  And believe me, this ain’t no, “Hey! I’ll send you a free print if you plug it on your shitty web site!”-type deal.  I bought this with my hard-earned five bucks.  I suggest you do the same… BEFORE THEY’RE ALL GONE.

Purchase your very own ‘2009 Phillies’ Facial Hair Guide’ 11 x 14 print for just $5.00 (+$2.00 s/h) at Etsy.

Oh, and I wouldn’t recommend defacing the print — that would go against the artist’s original vision — but I wouldn’t blame you if you took a black Sharpie and put a mole on Lidge’s face.  You have no idea how much restraint it took me not to do it.

…former Phillies reliever Ryan “Wimpiest bitch to ever take steroids” Franklin is now the wearer of some of the shittiest facial hair on the planet.

Now Philly can be known for cheesesteaks, historical shit, Rocky, and baseball players with shit facial hair.

You make us* proud, gentlemen.

(*by us I mean me, a Delaware Valleyian and proud owner of a shitty white guy ’stache)

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