Good luck.

COLE HAMELS! COLE HAMELS! COLE HAMELS!

I gotta be honest with you, I don’t care how many TV shows these guys go on — I’m posting every last one of ‘em here.  So get used to it.

Now enjoy Hamels on Rome Is Burning or whatever he calls it nowadays…

Trusty reader Mark McClure sent this along the other day under the subject line, “The country has little faith in The Fightins…”

It’s a highly-scientific survey conducted by those free-thinkers over at ESPN. The states colored red are the ones who think the Rays will win, the blue – Phillies (shouldn’t it technically be the opposite?):

With the exceptions of PA, NJ, and some other really tiny state, the entire country thinks the Rays will win. And you know as well as I do, most of the country is stupid.

Advantage: Phillies.

During last night’s Phillies/Padres game, Brian Giles attempted to catch a foul ball and practically re-created the famous Rodney McCray wall crash in front of a nationwide audience on ESPN. As Jayson Werth’s fly ball was carrying towards the right field wall, Giles gave chase and made a noble effort for the catch, but wound up barreling through the Welk Resorts advert in foul territory. Thankfully, Giles stayed in the game and proceeded to go 0-4.

Go ahead, laugh:

Weh-heh-helllll… looky, looky here! Seems like ESPN up and added some fancy new columns to its MLB standings today. Let’s have a look, shall we?

The first new column appears be each team’s percentage chance of winning their division. As of today, the Fightins’ are almost five-to-one favorites over the rest of the NL East next closest team to defend their title. Strangely enough, the Braves have a better chance, statistically speaking, than the Marlins.

Even better, according to whatever new-fangled calculatin’ gizmos them boys in Bristol have at their disposal, the Phils have a 70% chance of making the playoffs in 2008. I like those odds.

Of course, everything goes to shit if they don’t win the NL East: given their winning percentage against teams contending for the wild card, the Phillies’ chance of a postseason opportunity plummets to a slim 5.7%. Huh.

If that doesn’t light a fire under their asses, I don’t know what will.

• Lynniemac on Which One is More Likely?
• Lynniemac on Playoff Diary: Nearly Bartmanesque
• RJ on Playoff Diary: Nearly Bartmanesque
• Gonzo on Which One is More Likely?
• Negro Grande on Which One is More Likely?