Big League Stew’s in-house Q&A expert, David Brown, has landed my dream interviewee for his latest segment of Answer Man –  Mr. NQA himself, Shane Victorino.

Do yourself a favor and hurry over there to read the whole thing.  It’s lengthy, but it’s jam packed with entertaining nuggets.  Believe it or not, Phillies hopeful Marcus Giles almost stole the show from our fast-talking Hawaiian centerfielder.  He even dropped a fucking Stripes reference!  Here’s a preview:

David Brown: How long would it take to swim from Waikiki Beach to Penn’s Landing?

Shane Victorino: I don’t think I’d make it.

DB: If the NL East were settled by a surfing contest instead of baseball, could you carry the Phillies?

SV: Oh, no questions asked. [Ed Note: BINGO!] I don’t know how to surf; I’ll figure it out, though.

DB: You don’t surf?

SV: I got some ocean behind me but surfing, nah, I don’t surf.

DB: How come you’ve never been on a board?

SV: Because I play my sports on land.

Marcus Giles: I surf and rarely wear underwear.

DB: (Nice “Stripes” reference) Is that a fact, Jack? But you’re not from Hawaii.

MG: I’m from San Diego!

SV: (Simultaneously) He’s from San Diego. Next closest thing to surfing in Hawaii.

Here’s *my* favorite part:

DB: When are you going to run into a fence face-first like Aaron Rowand?

SV: When? Opening day, if I have to.

I fucking love this guy.

Answer Man: Shane Victorino talks Maui, Oprah, plus Jon & Kate | Big League Stew

Cole Hamels took a break from his busy schedule last week to experience the fantastic interview stylings of David Brown from Yahoo!’s Big League Stew.  For some reason, I forgot to link to it when it was published, so you’re getting it now.  It’s kind of fitting anyway, being that Big League Stew is run mostly by Cubs fans and tonight they get to feel the wrath of Cole in their home stadium.  I demand you go there yourself, but to whet your appetite, here’s a sampling:

Q: Has Cole Hamels ever smoked a whole pack of Camels?

CH: No. I think I smoked one cigarette in my life and I hated every minute of it. I’m glad I tried it, and I think it’s definitely something that’s not for me.

–

Q: In the Vet they had a court and jail underneath the stadium for the rowdiest of fans; which one of your teammates would be most likely to be arrested for doing something bad at an Eagles game?

CH: Shane Victorino, especially if he doesn’t take his ADD medicine. He can’t be quiet. He’s disappeared for the moment, but if he were in this locker room, you’d hear him saying something.

And that ain’t all.  Hollywood talks Steve Carlton, Donovan McNabb, cheesesteaks, the constitution, and there’s even a cameo by Ryan Howard.

Seriously, go there.  It’s like the second-best Hamels interview I ever read.  (A smidgen behind this one conducted by some strapping young blogger from Philadelphia)

Answer Man: Cole Hamels talks pink apes, Survivor, money | Big League Stew

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